Sunday, April 27, 2014

"You Can't Pay the Bills With Holy Cards" (Updated)

Bear could have... but his better angels prevailed.

Having lived in Italy, the Bear shudders to think of the posters that will be obscuring the two newest saints. The Bear's sense of humor was corrupted by too many Italian festivals, where nothing is sacred. (He was going to put, "Bless you, my child, on my first day as an official saint!" Honest.)

Anyway, the saint-making festivities cost a lot of Euros. Those evil capitalist companies have their uses, apparently.

In other news, St. Peter's Basilica is being renamed "The Edward Jones Dome." Naming rights for the former Edward Jones Dome in St. Louis are now on the market.

The Bear has discovered writings from what has become known as "The Time of Hibernation," i.e. the hiatus in blogging that followed the loss of hundreds of articles. In the unlikely event he runs out of things to blog about, he may trot one of those out from time to time. He has yet to tell the story of his disastrous foray into a Masters in Theology program. They might seem familiar to one reader ;-)

In the Headlines From Tomorrow Category, we have one that sounds pretty good from April 27, 2045:
DISSIDENT BISHOP FORMS SOCIETY OF ST. POPE JOHN XXIII TO PRESERVE NOVUS ORDO MASS, SSJ23 TO REVIVE "SPIRIT OF VATICAN II"
Update: ah yes, The People's Cube. Imagine if our Bavarian Woods were Soviet Russia, and the woodland creatures eager-to-please survivors trying to out-do each other in dedication to The Cause so they don't get shipped off to the beet collective. It is a Soviet-themed audience participation website with a serious message behind the parody. So, since this is a humor post... (But don't worry, the Bear is not going to follow recent trends and make every Church event an occasion for agitprop.)

"But what about my Nobel Peace Prize?
Fine, I still have more divisions than the Pope. I think."

Mozilla rolls out new Add-Ons to Firefox.


5 comments:

  1. LOL! :-D Priceless. Days of Future Past :-).

    And the news that the much-mourned Lost Articles have been discovered beneath winter's retreating snows is like getting a smile from Heaven :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well... they are not the old blog entries, sadly, but there were some Google+ entries from when I was in school that were pretty funny. The Bear misses the fun of those obscure days. "The Trouble With Tribles" [sic] and courses in witchcraft, etc. The Bear got an A in the class he blew off and an F in the class he worked his tail off in. I guess that's a C average? LOL Ah... The poor old Bear really thought he could still cut it in academia. If only he could have figured out a way to disable his BS detector...

    ReplyDelete
  3. I always suspected that the suffocating environment of political correctness in which you'd inevitably find yourself would guarantee a brief shelf-life for your noble endeavor. Tried not to come across as the Voice of Doom, though :-D.

    I've no doubt the experience was educational in ways the gatekeepers didn't intend.

    ReplyDelete
  4. They also serve who only sit and blog :-)

    ReplyDelete

Your comment will likely be posted after the Bear snuffles it. Please, no anonymous posts.

Featured Post

Judging Angels Chapter 1 Read by Author

Quick commercial for free, no-strings-attached gift of a professionally produced audio book of Judging Angels, Chapter 1: Last Things, read...