Next time your spouse surprises you during an assignation with your lover, calmly state, "Why, hello, my dear. I just want you to know we're not dining together, we are together dining."
Then, while dodging a blow aimed at your head, explain further.
"It's an important distinction, because it turns something suspect, like me having a cozy dinner at an expensive restaurant with an attractive member of the opposite sex fifteen years my junior, into a completely innocent occasion."
If you've managed to get all that out before being knocked to the canvas, you should consider a career as a professional boxer.
Or a spot on the Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue. According to them, when you see the Pope praying in the vicinity of Moslems or Jews who happen to be praying, too, not to worry. These are occasions where the pope and persons of other faiths have come "together for prayer, but not prayer together."
Got that? Because it's very, very important.
Because who are you going to believe? Your lying eyes or the Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue?