Saturday, December 6, 2014

Punch a Heretic Day

I came to give presents to kids and punch heretics. And I'm all out of presents.

St. Nicholas, shown above in the Russian iconic style was the bishop of Myra. His reputation for generosity stems from his surreptitiously leaving money at a poor man's home as a dowry, so that his three daughters would not be forced into prostitution. Tales have also come down regarding his miracles, which is why he is also called St. Nicholas the Wonderworker. He is the patron saint of sailors.

One of the most famous stories about St. Nicholas comes from his participation in the First Ecumenical Council of Nicea in 325. The old bishop apparently dozed through most of the proceedings. He did rouse himself, however, when Arius denied that Christ was both true man and true God. (Arianism would rip the nascent Christianity apart, so St. Nicholas' ire was warranted.) He seized Arius by the beard and punched him right in the face. St. Nicholas was arrested and locked up. However, the Virgin Mary miraculously freed him, which was good enough for the council fathers.

(Should any of his readers take the title of this article seriously, the Bear is available for the defense at a reduced fee and normal expenses, but must advise that the "St. Nicholas defense" is not likely to fly.)

Should you peradventure come across this after St. Nicholas' Day, remember, every day is Punch a Blasphemer Day. St. John Chrysostom told his assembly of the faithful to "sanctify thy right hand" by punching a blasphemer.

The first week of Advent almost gone!


  1. “JAW” LLY

    In Nicaea
    Three, two, five, A. D. -
    Two Bishops, they fought

    When Arius spewed,
    “Jesus Christ
    Not God,

    St. Nick
    His jaw –
    So “jaw” lly!!!


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