Saturday, September 26, 2015

Pope Struggles Up Stairs to Plane, Top YouTube Video Mocks

SCB News -- Notorious progressive Catholic site "Angelqueen" ran the Bear's recent paean to Pope Francis in its entirety. The report on the Pope's address to a joint meeting of Congress contributed to a disturbance in the woodlands, when animals burned trees and turned over logs to show disappointment that the Bear had not sufficiently abused the Pope. Angelqueen's publication of the report would seem to confirm fears that the Bear has lost his mind.

UPDATE -- Angelqueen's motto is "For purity and tradition." It is not, as originally reported, a "notorious progressive Catholic site." In fact, it leans slightly toward the more conservative end of the Catholic spectrum. The original article was written by a "cub" reporter and SCB News apologizes.

SCB News -- the Pope struggled to walk up the stairs as he boarded a plane for Philadelphia, carrying his own bag. (He has since landed, thanks be to God.) Gusty winds brought the 78-year-old Pontiff, who suffers from sciatica as well as the infirmities of age, nearly down to his knees several times. There was no one to assist him. The first You Tube video search result shows Pope Francis struggling, set to a laugh track and farting noises. There is a bonus video of Pope Francis stumbling when getting off a throne. (This is not that video with the added audio.)

(SCB Editorial) -- We at SCB News condemn making fun of Pope Francis struggling to climb the stairs to his jet by showing it with a laugh track and farting noises. Surely we can show our displeasure at the Holy Father because of his many deficiencies and errors with something short of a crude video with farting noises! We must send the message that there are limits, and respect sill means something in the Catholic Church, and the U.S. of A!

On behalf of SCB News, the Bear.


  1. I'm very glad he wasn't injured. And yes, the added soundtrack you described is disrespectful.

    But I will note that carrying his own bag is part of his "branding." I'm sure there are many, many people who would be more than glad to assist him if he allowed them to.

  2. I'm happy that someone commented on this story, Elizabeth.

    He probably thought he could handle the bag and the stairs. Older people (and the Bear is 1300 years old) sometimes get fooled by what their bodies are willing to give them at any given time.

    I don't think there's anything wrong with branding. That may be his way of reminding himself he may be pope, but he's just an old man. Maybe it is a bit of agitprop: see, I could have people care my bag, or even make them take me up the stairs in the sedia gestatoria (now THAT would be something to see!) but I'm not being a big shot, I'm being humble.

    Maybe it's the way he really is. Maybe it really IS the Vatican's nuclear football LOL.

    The Bear found it moving. What can he say? He's an old softie at heart. Sometimes we take pot shots at "a public figure," and it takes seeing him vulnerable to make us realize we share a mortality.

    Also, the video with the soundtrack made the Bear angry. That's my Pope being made fun of in the crudest possible way! I think that's a healthy reaction for a Catholic. But, like most things, it made me think. We're really in an exercise of line-drawing. No, I wouldn't do that, but I might do something else that someone else would find offensive or disrespectful. Sigh. More for a poor old Bear to think about. Blogging was so much easier when he just had fun. Now he's trying to be responsible. Bears are not known for that.

    1. I didn't listen to the soundtrack, because I was angry enough from the description. And I'm not a bear!

      I do think that someone who is his age should accept help. (I'm only 66, and I do, though it's sometimes hard to do so.) I would love to see him carried up in the sedia gestatoria, but I think that would be rather dangerous on stairs.


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