Now they'e naming them. "Winter Storm Ilias" was what they threatened poor old Bear with. The poor Shepherdess was running around buying coats for goats, sweaters for wethers, and stocking up on snowmelt and bananas. The Bear doesn't know why, but judging by the empty banana stand at the supermarket, everyone seems to agree that bananas are the key to surviving a winter storm.
|We're not kidding! This has catastrophe written all over it!|
Came the big night, and the Bear peeked outside about 2 a.m. The winter storm had done its worse. There was a glistening two inches covering everything.
The Bear supposes it is better to have a few extra bananas than be caught without if we did get six feet of snow. But you would think they would get it right once, if only by accident.
And yet, we're to believe they can predict weather trends for the entire planet decades in advance. Humans never fail to amuse Bears.
All the usual suspects are trumpeting that 2015 was the "warmest year on record." However, the scientists at the Heartland Institute say 2015 wasn't even close to being the warmest on record. Satellite records since 1979 show that 1989 was by far the warmest, followed by 2010, with 2015 third. And 2015 should have been hotter since we had the most powerful El Nino on record.
The more colossal the lie, the more people will believe that no one could be so bold as to broadcast it. After all, it is beyond belief that the president of the United States, the Vatican and the U.N. would just make up a story about global warming, right?
News like this is why you should visit St. Corbinian's Bear every day. The world's most popular Catholic ephemeris.