Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Pope Francis and the Fuhrerprinzip

The Fuhrerprinzip: the leader's word is above all written law.

The Live Act, to Warm Up the Audience

The Bear suspects some of you think he is wise, and puts much thought and research into his pieces for his ephemeris.

The Bear is at a loss to know why anyone would think this. See his bicycle? See him juggling copies of Amorous Laetsetse Fly? See him beg for salmon at the end of his threadbare circus cum vaudeville act, featuring Bear tricks, happy songs and snappy chatter, and some shaggy dog material thrown it for good measure?

Bear: "What do you say if Pope Francis makes sense?"

Band Leader: "I don't know. What do you say if Pope Francis makes sense?"

Bear: "Police! Somebody's kidnapped the pope!"

Then a rendition of the Bear's famous "Bunny Song," followed by a quick circle around the stage on the old bicycle, juggling bowling balls, after which the Bear crushes one in his jaws, a sure-fire crowd-pleaser.

The Two-Reeler

Then there's a two-reeler featuring the comedy duo of Cardinal Kasper and Cardinal Marx as two inept German sausage inspectors in,


1st Ginger Pic of 2017
(A real word, which is why Germans don't play Scrabble.)

The Feature Film

That is followed by the feature film: a musical comedy starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. Fred plays Cardinal Bergoglio, who has been elected pope. He says he wants to think it over, and, deep in thought, wanders into a dance studio in Rome, where Ginger teaches him to tango.

He falls in love with her, but sadly says they can't get married because he's the Pope. But some cardinals find him, and say he's not eligible to be pope anyway, since he's a manifest heretic!

Six months later, he divorces Ginger for Ruby Keeler, but says it's okay. Ginger marries the a Bear, no, a man in a Bear suit who is totally not THE Bear, or even a Bear, for that matter, and he says that's okay, too. (Red Death must never see this.)

Everybody lives happily ever after.

Now We Get Serious: the War Bond Pitch - Let's Show the Kaiser!

Look, humans. The Bear is not snarling at divorced people, or Lutherans, or whatever. At least not all the time. But, what Pope Francis completely fails to understand is that this is the 21st century. We know what he's up to. We have opinions. Yes, we - most of us, but the Bear is looking at you, Seattle Kim (mwah!) - recognize him as Pope, although a rather dubious specimen. You can't say, "Divorce & remarriage," and hit us sheep with the Pope stick. You can't say, "Lutherans take Communion," and never teach us what changed all of a sudden.

Frankly, these are the actions of a humbug.

Pope Francis does not feed the sheep. He beats them. Amorous Laewithwhoever is not food. It is indigestible Styrofoam kibbles with zero nutritional value, and probably laced with cyanide at that. Great teachers are succinct. Great Popes said it all in short encyclicals that all who run may read. So, then, what is it? It's a smokescreen for his cabal to hide behind as they dismantle the Catholic Faith.

We Riders of the Purple Page - what did one of his Liars for Hire call us? Murderers or something? (Because calling writers "murderers" is such an effective rhetorical device.) That is the language of a man who has decided to make himself the Bear's enemy. But we're not going away. You can't arbitrarily change stuff and quiet the peasants with hand-waving. Some of them are Bears, who cannot be frightened or bought off (except with lots of salmon, wink).

You Can't Just Make Up Stuff and Not Justify It

The Bear is sorry, but you can't just sit on the Humble Folding Chair of Peter, in the Humble Corner of the Vatican Garage, and yell crazy stuff like a street preacher without justifying it. The Bear - and his readers - want a cogent explanation of why, after all this time, divorce and remarriage is cool. And why, after all this time, Martin Luther was one of the greatest heroes in Christian history. Instead we get mutters of "pastoral," and "discernment,"  and "ecumenical." Seriously?

BOP! Hit with the Pope Stick again. Baaaaa.

When you don't offer real explanations, we are pretty sure you're lying to us, and abusing your office. Just sayin', the Bear's Judgment Day is iffy, but at least he didn't completely destroy the Roman Catholic Church.

The Bear knows what you're going to say. "No, he can't do that. No it's not so bad," Yeah, well, maybe technically he can't, because maybe there will be a Pope Billy Bob, in Del Rio, Texas, and the Church will have thirty members, or some other hypothetical situation. But all it takes is for the Church (the one in Rome) itself to officially say: "All that crap we used to teach in the past? Forget it. Now the Church is run by The Amazing Bergoglio, who channels Teilhard de Chardin with a Ouija board from one day to the next."

And that, loyal readers and visitors, is the problem in a nutshell. It's even not hard. A dubia was submitted. It resides in the Humble Outhouse of the Humble Cardboard Box in which Francis lives, serving the only purpose he deems it fit for, page by page. Because he sure as Hell isn't going to answer it.

If we were in court, and he were on the stand, and the Bear were cross-examining him, and he refused to answer the Bear's question, he would look worse than Captain Queeg. Yet, that is where we are at, isn't it?

The Bear is Tired of Scorpions, and Asks for a Fish

Pope Frances, the Bear is all ears. He has a modicum of intelligence and will respectfully listen to a real explanation. And don't throw a thirty pound, poorly ghostwritten piece of garbage at him and expect him to sift through it for the next ten years until he realizes it was written as a weapon, not instruction.

Explain what's different now. You're Pope? Wow. That would be a very, very bad reason.

The Bear would think it was great if Lutherans and everybody else could all be Christians with us! He knows people have suffered as divorced and remarried Catholics. Nobody wants to see that. The Bear is perfectly serious, here. He wishes we didn't have to worry about a bunch of old rules, and could be as laid back as Christian Scientists or Unitarians. The Bear wishes the Catholic Church could be all ice cream and helicopters.

So does Pope Francis, apparently. But, in the immortal words of Ricky Ricardo, "Lucy, you got some 'splainin' to do."

Francis Out on a Limb, Sawing, Expecting to Remain Suspended in Mid-Air
While the Vine of Christ Falls Away

Pope Francis enjoys what he views as the absolute power of the Papacy. He likes that part of the Faith. Everything else, though, is up for grabs. He foolishly imagines he can sit on the great limb, which comes from the True Vine, Christ, and saw it off. In his imagination, it is the Vine that falls, while the papal limb on which he sits remains suspended in mid-air.

It doesn't work that way. It's never worked that way. The Papacy is not run by the Fuhrerprinzip.

Will Francis really destroy the Church? No, the Bear doesn't think so. The Church is not just in Rome, and not confined to the person of the Pope. God sees it in an instant, stretching back in time, and forward to the future (which is probably the shorter line). The Bear reads his Bible more, these days, like a good Baptist, and pays less attention to an increasingly odd and out-of-touch Pope.

Let's stay in the Church in 2017, and the Bear means the Church that is saddled with Francis. He's a blip. So are you. (The Bear has been around 1300 years, and doesn't plan on going anywhere soon.) But let's complain. Let's be malcontents. Let's keep reminding each other - and Francis, because we knows this gets under his skin - why Francis owes us an explanation, or he's no good. Not out of ill will, but out of love for the Faith.

He's been approached privately. He's been approached by a few elders. The only thing left is for him to answer before the whole Church, or be treated as a tax-collector. Yeah, we got your Vatican II Powers of the Laity, remember those? Cuts both ways, doesn't it?

We're not reformers. We're preservers. If you want to change important, well-established things in the Catholic Faith, you had better be ready to justify yourself. Francis may be humble. A Bear doesn't know. But what a Bear sees is someone acting like the most egomaniacal, megalomaniac, full-of-himself, Nixonian-Saturday-Night-Massacre-paranoid, I-know-better-than-anyone, little jumped-up Jesuit poster boy for the Peter Principle (the other one), who thinks the Church is governed by the Führerprinzip.

The Bear hopes Pope Francis proves him wrong in 2017. He also hopes he wins the Pulitzer Prize.


  1. Netmilsmom said: The Bear is ON tonight. (Accidentally deleted it, instead of publishing.)


Moderation is On.

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